Red vs Blue and the half blood prince
by rockgod23
Summary: Let's assume that after RvB season 13 the reds and blues went back to blood gulch and the teleporter connected to a certain vanishing cabinet in a certain room of requirement. yes the hogwarts people thought peeves was bad wait till they meet the reds and blues
1. Chapter 1

Red Vs Blue and the Half Blood Prince

Prologue

 _Aboard the ship of Charon Industries_

"Keep firing" Tucker shouted, stabbing an enemy soldier "I think they're almost done."

All of the sudden a blast of laser fire started mowing down enemies on the other side. Carolina, Wash, Jensen, Palomo, Bitters, Andersmith, and Kimball were there giving the reds and blues covering fire.

"You guys get to the Pelican, we'll cover you" Wash told them.

"Thanks for saving our asses, we were running low on ammo" Sarge said

"Don't mention it Colonel" Kimball told him. "Lieutenants, escort the reds and blues to the Pelican."

"Yes ma'am" Andersmith responded, turning to the reds and blues "This way sirs."

The reds and blues followed the lieutenants to the Pelican while Kimball and the freelancers held of Hardgroves soldiers.

Safely aboard the Pelican the reds and blues were examined by Dr. Grey. Eventually Carolina, Wash and Kimball got to the Pelican and Lopez took the wheel. When they arrived safely back on Chorus they were met with cheers from the other soldiers. Soon after a UNSC ship came by to bring everyone to the main command center.

"You're Agents Washington and Carolina" one of the officers said to them "I guess you're the ones responsible for saving the planet."

"Actually, all the credit goes to those guys" Wash said pointing to the reds and blues "Without them none of us probably would have made it."

The officer looked at the reds and blues in a state of disbelief. Caboose was having his gun try on a cowboy hat. Sarge was attempting to get past engineers so he could tinker with the ships engines. Tucker was trying and failing to hit on one of the pilots. Grif was stuffing his face.

"Damn, first taking down the Meta then bringing the Director to justice and now preventing genocide. Those sim troopers never cease to amaze me."

It wasn't until later that everyone found out about Church's sacrifice. When they did Caboose couldn't stop crying to realize that the fragments left behind had joined together to form a full AI.

"Church, how could you leave your best friend like this?" Caboose wailed.

"I'm right here dumbass" the latest version of Church told him.

After everything was sorted out the people of Chorus decided to try to reform a nation there, this time with help from the UNSC. Sarge was promoted to general only so he would shut up about his "amazing leadership skills". Tucker was visited by his son who was now the commander of an entire fleet of aliens. The other members received medals for their services, a purple heart for Grif, a pink heart for Donut, and a brown nose for Simmons. After much thought the reds and blues decided to move back to blood gulch, joined by Wash, Doc, and Carolina. They thought they would finally be able to spend some time without having to deal with any stupid adventures. But of course, Donut had to hear voices coming from the teleporter.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

 _In the room of requirement_

Draco Malfoy stood in front of the vanishing cabinet wondering what went wrong. He was supposed to put an apple inside which would be taken by the shopkeeper of Borgin and Burkes. The shopkeeper would then take a bite out of it and put it back. The apple, however, was entirely gone.

"I thought he said he fixed the other cabinet." Malfoy said with a look of annoyance on his face. It didn't remain long though because the next thing he heard caused the look to change to a shocked kind of look.

"Grif, why did you just eat that apple?"

"Um, because I was hungry and it was edible."

Malfoy stood there dumbfounded. Who was this Grif person and why did the vanishing cabinet connect to him instead of the one at Borgin and Burkes.

"Hello, are you a death eater?" Malfoy called out in hopes that this person was under orders from Voldemort.

"I HEAR THE SOUND OF A NEW FRIEND" called out a new voice. This one sounded like that of a child.

"Caboose wait, we don't know what's on the other-"

Whoever was talking didn't get a chance to finish because Caboose ran through the cabinet. Malfoy's jaw dropped. Standing in front of him was what appeared to be some sort of bipedal creature made out of some sort of metal. It was mostly blue with the exception of a gold area on its face(?). Malfoy assumed it was probably the creature's eye. The creature also appeared to be carrying some sort of weapon. He didn't know whether to run, scream, or cast a spell at it. After a few seconds thought, Malfoy decided the best thing to do would be to do both.

"OH BOY, ARE WE PLAYING TAG?!" Caboose shouted with glee in his voice. "I LOVE TAG!"

Caboose ran after Malfoy out of the room. When he got out he was met with looks of shock. He was in a hall with a lot of kids who appeared to be preteens or in their early teens. He looked at them and they looked at them. He looked at them and they looked at him. One girl screamed. Everyone started running in all different directions.

Now, any of the other reds and blues would have, at this point in time, realized they were still wearing armor, they were still carrying a weapon, and the kids running were, well, kids. Then they would put 2 and 2 together and realize they must look quite scary to these kids. Caboose, however, was a bit of an idiot. Since Caboose was an idiot, he naturally thought all the kids were playing tag with him too. So, he turned left and started running. He probably would have made it more than 10 feet if he hadn't ran right into a man with long slick black hair and a hooked nose.

"Stop right there monster." The man said in a stern voice.


	3. Chapter 3

**Authors Note: yeah I don't own red vs blue or harry potter yadda yadda yadda. Please review constructive criticism would be appreciated. Well let's get started**

Chapter 3

 _In professor dumbledores office:_

Professor Dumbledore sat in his office looking through his memories. He had been trying to find the memory of his first meeting with Tom Riddle before the sorting hat interrupted him.

"Professor, I am getting a strange feeling that something is about to change everything."

"What do you mean Migeltius?" Dumbledore asked the hat.

"I sense a presence, a presence of powerful magic."

Before Dumbledore could ask the hat where the source of magic was coming from Professor McGonigal barged into the room.

"Professor, there is a commotion near the great hall."

 _In the room of requirement:_

"Yeah, Caboose went through here alright." Tucker said tripping over a standard assault rifle.

"How do you know blue?" Sarge asked

"He left Freckles here, Sarge." Simmons responded "Judging by the looks of this place I doubt they've invented automatic rifles that fire 15 rounds per second."

Guys something is messing with my systems. I think there may be some kind of EMP in here.

"Lopez, we've already covered the fact that Caboose went through this place. Try to keep up with us." Sarge said. Unfortunately nobody was able to understand Lopez because his speech unit was set to Spanish.

"So how do we find Caboose?" Wash asked Carolina.

"I'd say we follow the sound of screaming people." she responded.

 _With Caboose and Snape:_

"What are you?" Snape asked Caboose, his wand aimed at him.

"I'm Caboose." Caboose answered in his usual cheerful voice.

"What are you doing here?" Snape asked.

"I'm playing tag with all the other people. Oh, I know, you can play too if you want."

Caboose then touched Snape on the shoulder.

"You're it. Now you have to tag me." Caboose said.

"Do not touch me creature." Snape snarled

"Oh no, you see that's how you play. I was it so I had to tag you now you're it and you have to tag me." Caboose told him still not having the social skills to understand what was happening.

"Go back where you came from before I send you there myself." Snape said preparing to cast a spell before he was interrupted by a gruff voice.

"If I were you I wouldn't attack him. If anyone's gonna kill these blues it's gonna be the red team."

Snape turned to see more creatures just like the one he was just talking to. He noticed they all had different colored bodies, and were armed with guns. As far as he could tell they were strange wand variations that muggles used to kill each other. The red one who had just addressed him had his gun right at Snape's face.

"Goddammit Caboose, can you even be separated from us for 5 seconds without getting yourself into trouble. At least don't lose Freckles next time." Tucker said handing Freckles to Caboose.

"Are you okay Captain Caboose?" Freckles asked.

"Yeah we were just playing tag."

"Caboose I know you're dumb so I'll tell you what was happening. He was going to kill you." Grif said pointing to Snape.

"Do you really think your muggle weapons can harm me? I will make your death quick. Avada ke-"

"What is going on here?"

Everyone turned to see a man with long white hair and a long white beard.

"Professor Dumbledore, these creatures have invaded the school. They were trying to endanger the students." Snape said gesturing toward the reds and blues.

"And you decided the best course of action was to use an unforgivable curse instead of attempting to talk peacefully?" Dumbledore asked Snape.

"Dumbledore, is it?" Wash spoke up lowering his weapon "I'm sorry about Caboose. He can get a little confused, but I assure you he meant no harm to your students. Now if you would just let us go we'll take him and get out of your hair."

"How did you even arrive here? And who are you anyway?"

"I'm Washington. And these are my friends, Sarge, Grif, Simmons, Tucker, Caboose, Doc, Lopez, Donut, and Carolina. As for how we got here, we heard voices coming from our teleporter and-"

"I told them we should just forget about it before the idiot in blue here ran through the teleporter." Grif interrupted.

"Yeah, look we didn't mean to cause any trouble so we'll just go and no harm no foul." Tucker finished.

"I would like you all to come with me first." Dumbledore said.

Suddenly a huge man with a mass of hair covering his face ran up to them.

"Professor Dumbledore sir, when I her' abou' the c'mmotion I came as fast as I could." The man said panting.

"Whoa, what's up gigantor?" Church said finally appearing.

"Yeh got er problem with how I look ghost?" Hagrid asked glaring at Church.

"No" O'mally spoke up "we've just got a problem by the fact that first our blue friend gets attacked by greaseball here and then you waste more of our time by interrupting this old bastard."

"Don' ever insult Albus Dumbledore in fron of me." Hagrid said grabbing Doc by his neck.

"Hey put him down dirt bag." Sarge said pointing his shotgun at Hagrid.

"Yeah, cocksucker, you mess with one of us you're messing with all of us." Simmons added pointing his battle rifle at Hagrid as well.

"Guys, can't we all sit down and discuss this situation rationally." Doc said.

"Dumbledore, you said you wanted to take us somewhere?" Wash asked.

"Yes." Dumbledore replied. "Hagrid put the man down."

After Hagrid let Doc go with a glare Dumbledore led them all to his office. There the reds and blues were introduced to the sorting hat.

"Greetings, allow me to explain to you why I want to speak to you all." The hat said.

"That sounds like way too much to listen to. Can't you just give us the cliffsnotes?" Grif whined.

"Shut up and let him speak ass hole." Simmons said punching Grif.

"My name is Migeltius. I have lived for longer than you can even imagine. Years ago there was a prophecy given about a group of great warriors. 11 soldiers with magical powers unlike anything ever seen would arrive in our world and aid us against a great evil. Right now our world is falling apart. People are living in fear of the death eaters and I fear Voldemort, a man so evil he has no physical heart, will soon kill us all."

"No heart, that seems physically impossible." Doc said.

"So what do we have to do with all this?" Sarge asked.

"I believe that you are the warriors mentioned in the prophecy. I can see into your mind body soul and past. You have done amazing things under harsh odds. And I can sense in you great magical power waiting to be unlocked. With your help we may be able to stop Voldemort."

"Nah" Grif said.

"Yeah that doesn't really sound like our thing." Tucker said.

"No offense, but we just risked our lives saving an entire planet from genocide a couple weeks ago. We are really not in the mood to get ourselves mixed up in another war." Wash explained.

"This ain't our fight." Sarge added.

"In that case Snape kill them." Migeltius said.

"Then again no need to make any hasty decisions." Wash said.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

As the reds and blues went to their house rooms they met a few of the other students. Cho Chang introduced herself to Simmons. "Hello Simmons, I'm Cho Chang one of the Ravenclaw prefects. Do you need any help getting settled in?"

"…" Simmons started, "Uh that's f-er fine,"

"Way to lose your cool." Washington chuckled.

"I get nervous around girls, don't judge me."

As Grif, Doc, and Lopez went to the Slytherin dorms they were approached by Professor Snape.

"I don't care what Professor Dumbledore says, you are not going to succeed in my classes." He said.

 _"Douche"_ Lopez responded.

"Don't you think you should give us a chance before judging us?" Doc asked.

"I have never seen mudbloods as bad as yourself." Snape answered coldly.

"That's the second time I've heard that phrase, what the hell does it mean?" Grif asked.

"It is a term for non magic people." A portrait spoke up.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" Grif shouted.

"Normally I wouldn't agree that muggle born wizards are terrible but I have no confidence in your abilities." The portrait continued.

"No. You're a painting. Paintings don't talk." Grif continued, clearly in denial. A couple passing students laughed and in return Grif flipped them off adding in "Fuck you."

When Tucker, Sarge, and Carolina reached the Gryfindor tower they had a similar reaction to Grif. Tucker jumped back in shock as Sarge pulled out his shotgun. Carolina, however, kept a cool attitude. "The paintings here talk?" she said skeptically.

"Yes" Hermione told her, "If you want to learn about them Hogwarts a history is a great book for that."

"Yeah, cool, whatever, nerd stuff. Where is the Gryfindor house at anyway?" Tucker asked her.

"Hogwarts a history is not nerd stuff. It is a book compiled of all the information you need about the Hogwarts castle." Hermione ranted.

"Exactly, now how do we get to the house?" Tucker asked.

"Right this way" Hermione said walking up to a painting of a fat lady "Dilligrout." She said. The painting swung open leading to a staircase to the tower. "Really" Tucker said rolling his eyes.

The next day:

The Slytherin dorms were mostly empty except for one bed. In that bed was Grif, snoring and cuddled up with a package of oreos. The only other person was Professor Snape, standing there with a look of disgust on his face. "One night and his space already looks like a pigsty." He muttered to himself, "How can anyone call him a Slytherin." Snape kicked the bed but Grif kept snoring. "Get up you lazy degenerate." Snape said to him. Grif just rolled over and flipped Snape off. Snape then gave up and left.

As Professor Snape left the Slytherin dungeons he walked right into Sarge. "Grif's still sleeping huh." He said.

"How can anyone wake up someone that lazy." Snape replied.

"You just have to know how to encourage him." Sarge said with a malicious grin.

"Show me."

Sarge chuckled and pulled out his shotgun. When Snape led him to Grifs bed he leaned over and shouted, "GET THE HELL UP ON THE DOUBLE YOU GOOD FOR NOTHING DIRT BAG!"

"Go away and let me sleep Sarge" Grif whined.

In response Sarge shot Grif in the leg.

"YOU SENILE OLD FUCK!" Grif shouted hopping out of bed.

"Great, you're up. Now get going on the double."

"I will only go as fast as single and a half."

Sarge grumbled and pointed his shotgun at Grifs face.

"Fine."

"I never thought I'd meet a Gryfindor I actually liked" Snape said grinning.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 4

As the reds and blues went to their house rooms they met a few of the other students. Cho Chang introduced herself to Simmons. "Hello Simmons, I'm Cho Chang one of the Ravenclaw prefects. Do you need any help getting settled in?"

"…" Simmons started, "Uh that's f-er fine,"

"Way to lose your cool." Washington chuckled.

"I get nervous around girls, don't judge me."

As Grif, Doc, and Lopez went to the Slytherin dorms they were approached by Professor Snape.

"I don't care what Professor Dumbledore says, you are not going to succeed in my classes." He said.

 _"Douche"_ Lopez responded.

"Don't you think you should give us a chance before judging us?" Doc asked.

"I have never seen mudbloods as bad as yourself." Snape answered coldly.

"That's the second time I've heard that phrase, what the hell does it mean?" Grif asked.

"It is a term for non magic people." A portrait spoke up.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" Grif shouted.

"Normally I wouldn't agree that muggle born wizards are terrible but I have no confidence in your abilities." The portrait continued.

"No. You're a painting. Paintings don't talk." Grif continued, clearly in denial. A couple passing students laughed and in return Grif flipped them off adding in "Fuck you."

When Tucker, Sarge, and Carolina reached the Gryfindor tower they had a similar reaction to Grif. Tucker jumped back in shock as Sarge pulled out his shotgun. Carolina, however, kept a cool attitude. "The paintings here talk?" she said skeptically.

"Yes" Hermione told her, "If you want to learn about them Hogwarts a history is a great book for that."

"Yeah, cool, whatever, nerd stuff. Where is the Gryfindor house at anyway?" Tucker asked her.

"Hogwarts a history is not nerd stuff. It is a book compiled of all the information you need about the Hogwarts castle." Hermione ranted.

"Exactly, now how do we get to the house?" Tucker asked.

"Right this way" Hermione said walking up to a painting of a fat lady "Dilligrout." She said. The painting swung open leading to a staircase to the tower. "Really" Tucker said rolling his eyes.

The next day:

The Slytherin dorms were mostly empty except for one bed. In that bed was Grif, snoring and cuddled up with a package of oreos. The only other person was Professor Snape, standing there with a look of disgust on his face. "One night and his space already looks like a pigsty." He muttered to himself, "How can anyone call him a Slytherin." Snape kicked the bed but Grif kept snoring. "Get up you lazy degenerate." Snape said to him. Grif just rolled over and flipped Snape off. Snape then gave up and left.

As Professor Snape left the Slytherin dungeons he walked right into Sarge. "Grif's still sleeping huh." He said.

"How can anyone wake up someone that lazy." Snape replied.

"You just have to know how to encourage him." Sarge said with a malicious grin.

"Show me."

Sarge chuckled and pulled out his shotgun. When Snape led him to Grifs bed he leaned over and shouted, "GET THE HELL UP ON THE DOUBLE YOU GOOD FOR NOTHING DIRT BAG!"

"Go away and let me sleep Sarge" Grif whined.

In response Sarge shot Grif in the leg.

"YOU SENILE OLD FUCK!" Grif shouted hopping out of bed.

"Great, you're up. Now get going on the double."

"I will only go as fast as single and a half."

Sarge grumbled and pointed his shotgun at Grifs face.

"Fine."

"I never thought I'd meet a Gryfindor I actually liked" Snape said grinning.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 5

Grif walked into the dining hall and found Sarge, Simmons, Donut, and Lopez sitting together. "Get over here Grif, emergency team meeting." Sarge called out. After Grif sat down Sarge turned to him asking "Where the hell were you all morning?"

"That fucking Professor Snape yelled at me and gave me two weeks detention cleaning out bedpans in the infirmary." Grif complained.

"What did you expect?" Tucker asked him while passing by "you missed all of the morning classes. But hey, I got detention too so you're not alone."

"Be careful Grif" Sarge told him "He might try to convince you red and blue are the same again."

"Are you still hung up on that?" Grif asked him. "What did Tucker do anyway?"

Flashback:

Tucker sat in Professor McGonagalls class tapping his new wand on the desk cause he was bored.

"Transfiguration" Professor McGonagall started "May be difficult for someone who has no experience. Just remember not to poke your wand in the turtles face when trying to turn it int- can I help you Tucker?"

Tucker was snickering causing the rest of the class to look at him. "It's good Professor." He said.

"Also don't poke it in the chest."

Tucker started laughing a little louder this time.

"Ahem, and never poke it in between the legs."

"Okay I gotta take this one" Tucker said "BOW CHICKA BOW WOW!"

"Detention Tucker."

End of flashback:

"Nothin" Tucker said.

At the Gryfindore table Carolina was talking with Wash. "We have to figure out more about this prophecy." She told him.

"Has Church found out anything yet?" Wash asked.

"No," Church said, coming out, "I can't figure out anything from these books cause I can't fuckin download them. Seriously these people don't have like audible or something."

"Is that a ghost?"

Carolina, Wash, and Church turned to see Hermione staring at the AI unit.

"Heh, I used to think that." Church told her "No, I'm actually an AI unit."

"AI, what does the A stand for?" Ron asked.

"Artificial." Wash told him.

"And what does the I stand for?"

"Intelligence. It's an artificial intelligence unit."

"What does it do?" Nevil asked, as more of the Gryfindores were looking at Church with interest.

"I'm basically a computer." Church told them.

"Wait, are we worshipping Church again?" Caboose asked, "Because I want everyone to know that I've been worshipping Church before it was even cool."

"NO CABOOSE. THAT WILL STILL NEVER BE COOL!" Grif shouted from across the room.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 6

The Slytherins and Gryfindores were together in defense against the dark arts, the last class of the day. "You all may be able to cast a spell normally," professor Snape started "but I doubt any of you will be able to cast a silent spell. The silent spell takes an immense amount of concentration, but with it you will have a great advantage against any opponent. Can anyone tell me what that advantage is?"

The class all looked on with blank stares. "Your opponent won't see it coming." Carolina said. "You can't defend against what you don't know is coming."

"That is correct, now you will all be paired up and practice the silent curse."

The students all paired up and started practicing. Carolina was paired with Hermione. "So," Hermione asked, "Where did you receive Church?"

"Would you believe I met him while I was hunting down my father?" she asked

"WHAT?" Hermione shouted.

At the end of class still no one had managed to cast a silent spell. All of a sudden Harry, who had been paired with Tucker, went flying backwards. "Oh hell yeah." Tucker shouted.

"Good work Tucker. Class dismissed."

As everyone left the classroom Professor Snape turned to see Grif still trying to cast spells. "Grif" he said "class is dismissed. Grif. Grif." He tried to grab Grif by the shoulder and his hand went right through.

Professor Snape walked angrily into Dumbledores office. "Professor, I can understand saying the others have potential but Grif will never amount to anything. Why do you keep him here?"

"Hm," Professor Dumbledore said thoughtfully, "what exactly did he do?"

"He casted an illusion charm and slept through the entire class."

"Well I'm sure giving him more work will make him think about his actions."

At that moment Wash and Carolina walked in. "You wanted to see us professor?" Carolina asked.

"Yes. Next week during the Christmas break you will be seeing the minister of magic."

"Minister of magic?" Wash asked.

"Oh and what the fuck kind of password is cockroach clusters?" Church asked.

"That's the password. And I thought password was a shitty password." Grif said standing next to Snape.

An hour later Tucker and Grif were in the infirmary cleaning out the bed pans.

"Hey, why can't we just use magic for this? There's no sort of instant cleaning spell or whatever?" Grif asked.

"Yeah, it would be way more efficient." Tucker added.

"Ten points from Gryfindor." Snape said.

"What the fuck?" Tucker said.

"Ten points from Gryfindor." Snape said again.

"Oh this is fucking bullshit." Tucker said.

"Another ten points from Gryfindor, and unless you want it to become fifty points I would advise not talking back."

"Fine." Tucker said then muttered under his breath, "I'm going to spit in your next meal."

Doc walked in with Madam Pomfrey talking to her about magic and muggle remedies.

"Hey Professor Snape, why are you working them so hard?" Doc asked.

"It doesn't matter to you." Snape said.

"You know maybe you should try being a little more encouraging they would do better."

Snape ignored Doc while Tucker and Grif continued cleaning the bedpans.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 7

When Christmas break came around the reds and blues had talked over their plans. The reds would be staying at the Weasleys while the blues would be going to the ministry of magic. When the blue team met the minister of magic they started talking things over. Wash suggested that they get help from the muggles but the minister wouldn't allow it. They argued over it for a while until an urgent note came in telling the Scrimgeour that the ministry was under attack. When the blues and Scrimgeour went to check it out they saw two men shooting wizards left and right one was a big man while the other was smaller. They were wearing nearly identical black suits except the big man was wearing a green tie, mask and glasses and the small man was wearing orange ones.

 _A few minutes earlier._

The two men were standing in an empty bathroom. "What are we doing here?" the small man asked.

"Our employer wanted us to take in Yaxley." The big man responded.

"Yeah, but we promised ourselves we'd have nothing to do with magic after all that bullshit with Voldemort."

"Well, if our employers hunch is correct, then it's more than likely Voldemort is involved."

"Hey Sam," the small man said putting on a pair of orange glasses and attaching a silencer to his gun, "You ready?"

"Stick to codenames."

Back in the present.

"What the fuck is with these guys?" Wash said to Carolina.

"Yeah who the hell are you guys?" Tucker asked.

"They look kind of familiar." Church said.

The small man looked up at the blues while the big man hoisted Yaxley over his shoulder. "Well that's Locus, I'm Felix and basically were the good guys."

"What the fuck?" Tucker shouted.

"I know, they're not in their armor." Caboose said.

 **Whoo two chapters in one day sorry I'm having trouble posting so often I have a lot of school work but I hope I'll be able to post more during the summer.**


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 8

Two men stood in the locked bathroom at the abandoned office building. What they knew that most muggles didn't was that it was an entrance to the ministry of magic. They had been hired recently by an anonymous client to kill someone from the ministry of magic. As the bigger man wiped makeup off of his forehead the smaller man glared at him. "I hate this bullshit." He said.

"We were hired for a lot of money to kill an unsuspecting target. So far these people don't even know that the deaths are being caused by "muggles"" the bigger man replied.

"Yeah but do we really have to go through a fucking toilet? Seriously, what is wrong with these people" the small man groaned while pulling a briefcase from an air vent.

"Just put your mask on and load up" the big man said putting on a green mask.

"Alright Sam," the smaller man said putting on an orange mask, "You ready?"

"Stick to codenames."

When Felix and Locus appeared in the middle of the ministry of magic they were expecting many things. 20 black robed men however, wasn't on the list.

"Hey guys," Felix said his hands in the air "I know this looks pretty bad, but we have an appointment with Lucious Malfoy so why don't you let us go through."

"Havada kedavra" someone shouted.

"Yeah didn't think so." Felix said opening fire.

A few minutes and quite a few casualties later Felix and Locus barged into the office where Luscious Malfoy was working. Luscious pulled out his gun only to be tranqued by Locus. Dragging his body outside they were confronted by a bunch of armored men.

"Wait who the fuck aare these guys" an AI suddenlypopped out asking.

"Well he's Locus I'm Felix and basically we're the good guys." Felix said before following Locus through the exit.

"What the fuck?" Tucker shouted.

 **Hey guys sorry this took so long to come out I was working out of state the whole summer anyway I have writers block on this thing right now so I don't know when I will load another one next but I may start working on an oc self insert fanfiction soon so if you're interested check it out when it comes out and review.**


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 9

In the Weasley home Sarge, was explaining how his shotgun worked to Mr. Weasley, while Grif and Simmons were looking at Rons comics. "Wow, these comics are lame" Grif said.

"They're funny" Ron retorted.

"Actually I have to agree with Grif" Simmons said "The adventures of "Marvin the Mad Muggle" is literally just making fun of muggles, who by the way have way better comics."

"Yeah, haven't you heard of Batman?" Grif asked

"Or spider-man" Simmons added.

"How about X-Men?" Doc put in

 _"I prefer the punisher"_ Lopez said.

"oh deadpool" Grif threw in.

"I like Ziggy." Donut said.

"NOBODY CARES!" Grif and Simmons shouted.

"So what's spider-man?" Ron asked.

"One of Stan Lee's greatest comics ever." Simmons said "You know does whatever a spider can."

"Who's Stan Lee?" Ron asked

"Oh man," Grif laughed "you need an education.

Suddenly there was a loud pop. Everyone turned to see the blues, Carolina, and Dumbledore. "Felix and (wheez) Locus." Tucker panted out.

"Tucker why are you breathing so heavily?" Church asked "we didn't even run anywhere."

"Felix and Locus?" Simmons asked "we saw Felix die though."

"This world must have another version of them," Wash said. "They weren't wearing their armor or carrying their usual weapons."

"We'll have to start looking for information about them," Church said. "Dumbledore do you know why they would attack the ministry of magic?"

"There are plenty of death eaters in the ministry, but I don't know why a muggle would attack." Dumbledore answered.

"Alright then," Carolina spoke up "tomorrow we're going out to figure out who these versions are and why they attacked the ministry. Wash and I will look into the mercenaries and bounty hunters and see what we can dig up. The reds and blues will go with Dumbledore, Harry, Hermione, and the Weasleys to figure out why they'd attack the ministry."

"I will not allow you to take my children to chase after dangerous muggles. What if they get killed?" Mrs. Weasley argued.

"Listen maam, were gonna need help on this mission from people who know more about the wizard world than us," Sarge explained, "and if what Dumbledore says is true then I'm sure your kids can handle something like this."

"Fine," Mrs. Weasley said " but my children stay with me at all times."

 **Guess who's back baby! I'm back and hopefully hear to stay I just finished dealing with all the post high school graduation crap including my parents trying to get me to spend a year in Israel but now I'm back to write and get schwifty and yes I do watch rick and morty and no I wasn't going to start singing the Eminem song no I don't own red vs blue or harry potter wish I did please like and review and let me know that I don't seem like an idiot right now cause I look to all of you for the love and support I can never get from my family.**


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 10

The reds, blues, Harry, and the Weasleys walked down diagon alley, Grif and Simmons gawking at everything, while Caboose was trying to pet the owls that were flying about.

"Alright Washington, Carolina, follow me and I'll take you to see the minister" Mr. Weasley said waving them on, "Ron, Harry, Hermione, do try to keep the rest of the reds and blues out of trouble."

"So what do you all do?" Ron asked them.

"Eh, normally we just stand around and talk." Simmons said.

"I don't know about you guys but I could seriously go for some ice cream." Grif said.

"There's a shop right over there" Harry said pointing in the direction of the stand.

"I don't have enough money" Ron sighed.

"Okay seriously how are you guys so poor" Tucker asked him "isn't there some kind of money creating spell? In fact can't you just say accio money and get a billion dollars?"

"Do you have any of these galleons with you?" Omally asked Ron.

"Yeah, right here." Ron said handing one to Doc/O'mally.

"Hm, come with me and I will make you very rich muahahaha."

"Omally, please don't start getting people into trouble." Doc said nervously.

"How will you make me rich with one galleon."

"how much is the exchange rate from one galleon to American dollars?" Omally asked.

"About 7 dollars give or take." Hermione answered "why?"

"Well your galleons weigh at least one gram, and one gram of gold can be sold to any muggle pawn shop for 40 dollars."

"I don't know about this Ron, it seems rather dishonest." Hermione said.

"Nonsense we are just taking advantage of multiple currencies set in place." Omally laughed.

With that Omally apparated away along with Ron. Grif was still stuffing his face with ice cream, while Donut was eyeing the wizard fashion with a disappointed look on his face.

"Hey guys where's Caboose?" Tucker asked.

"He was right here." Harry said panicking.

Suddenly a loud crash came from the pet shop.

"I think I know where he went." Simmons said.

Tucker sighed "Let's go get him before he gets himself in trouble."

 **Hey guys sorry I haven't uploaded in a while I just got back from Israel last week and I was insanely busy getting ready for Passover. So comment let me know what you think and next chapter the freelancers may or may not inform the muggles about the wizarding world. It all depends on what you vote for. I won't be able to upload for the next couple days just thought id write this so you didn't think I was dead.**


End file.
